Think Positive

Today I had another ultrasound and blood work with hope that we could schedule our egg retrieval for Friday. I drove two hours by myself to Columbus today for an 8:15am appointment. On my way to Columbus as I was driving on the highway I watched the sun rise and noticed there was one beam of light shining directly from the clouds down to the ground. The beam of light made me think about how our angels have been shining their light down on us throughout this whole process and made me believe today was going to be a great day. Periodically on my drive I found myself tearing up-thinking about Riley's death and remembering how she was born with her cord wrapped around her neck. I thought about my niece Raegan and how close she and I have always been since she was born just 2 years and 1 day after Riley was born. I remembered my sister being induced on March 1, 2010, on Riley's second birthday, and I remember the monitors going off and nurses rushing in to her room to reposition my Raegan while telling us the cord was probably wrapped around her. I remember that moment so clearly-like it was yesterday, and I remember how terrified I was for my sister and niece and the flashbacks that it caused me that day. I remember being with my sister through her entire labor, every push, every breath she took. And I remember how amazing it was seeing my niece born, hearing her cry, and cutting her umbilical cord that at one point cut off her oxygen the night before. I prayed the whole way to Columbus that one day soon my sister would be able to be in the delivery room with me as I delivered my baby, helping me through every push and every breath, and taking in the first cries with me.

When I got to Columbus I had my blood work done first and then the ultrasound. My follicles are HUGE today! I can't even believe my ovaries are holding that many follicles at that size. That would explain why my stomach is so sensitive to the touch right now. The doctor was pleased with the number of mature follicles he was seeing today. It looked like I had about 12 follicles which were completely matured and about 10 more that could be matured in the next two days. Based on my ultrasound results, the doctor and nurse were sure we could schedule the egg retrieval for Friday but they needed to wait on my blood work to come back to be positive. If my blood work came back that my estrogen level was above 4,000 then it means I have Ovarian Hyperstimulation which would delay the retrieval by a few days and would decrease the number of eggs that we would expect to get. I was told I would get a call by 4pm with the results and instructions for the next steps.

Once I left Columbus I got to drive 1.5 hours to Dayton which gave me a lot of time to think. I was trying not to get too anxious about what the blood work would show...but with all the negative things that have happened to me on our journey to parenthood, of course I was worried. I just kept praying that everything was going to come back fine. I talked to my mom and she said she was confident this was going to work for us which reassured me we were doing the right thing.

Time seemed to tick so slow as I waited for the phone call. Finally at almost 4pm I got the call and it was the best news we could have received! My estrogen was just above 3,800 which meant I was cleared for the egg retrieval on Friday!!! I received all the instructions for the next three days, writing down the medications I'm supposed to take and when I'm supposed to take them. Once we hung up the phone I instantly started crying tears of joy.

Six years ago today we buried our first child. Unless you have buried your own child you couldn't possibly imagine how difficult that was. With the news we received today, I can't help but to think Riley was giving us her blessing to keep moving forward in our life with creating our family! There is just no other explanation, as worried as the nurses have been this past week of the possibility of me developing Ovarian Hyperstimulation, I know it was my angels protecting me and helping everything to go smoothly:) Everything just seems to be falling into place on such important dates to me that all involve anniversaries of our angels, and today was no different!!

Tonight I will have a nurse that I work with give me the HCG injection, Novarel, because it is an intramuscular injection (in my butt basically). It must be given at exactly 9:35pm. Then tomorrow I have to wake up at 7:30am and take a pregnancy test to see if the injection worked. It is supposed to trigger ovulation, but should give me a positive pregnancy test result. The positive result does not mean I am pregnant...just that the injection worked. I will also start an antibiotic to make sure I don't get an infection from the egg retrieval. For the rest of tonight I am going to Think Positive...that tomorrow there will be two pink lines on that pregnancy test and that everything is going to work out perfectly this time!