I Have A Dream....

In light of Martin Luther King Day, I thought I would share some of my own dreams.

I have a dream that one day pregnancy loss will no longer be silenced. I have a dream that one day society will understand that even a miscarriage in early pregnancy is an unfathomable loss of a baby. I have a dream that one day women and men would be able to share the joyful news of pregnancy with friends and family as soon as they find out and not be looked at as if it is too early to be sharing. I have a dream that one day women would know they do not have to grieve alone after the loss of a baby at 5 weeks gestation or 1 year old. I have a dream that one day men will recognize it is okay to cry and talk about their pain too. I have a dream that one day Honoring Angels support group will be a utilized support service by the grieving families in our community.

I have a dream that one day my husband and I would have living children. I have a dream that one day I would feel the overwhelming sense of accomplishment and pride after giving birth to our baby. I have a dream that one day I will be able to breast-feed and rock our baby to sleep while singing nursery rhymes. I have a dream that one day we will get to celebrate every first milestone that our children accomplish with them. I have a dream that one day we will have birthday parties for our children with our families and will have children to celebrate holidays with. I have a dream that one day our home will be filled with toys, our children's art projects on the refrigerator, and homework papers spread across the kitchen table. I have a dream that one day our vacations will be to Disney World, family resorts, and waterparks.

I have a dream that one day we can instill our values into our children. I have a dream that one day we can teach our children what it means to love unconditionally, to accept people's differences, and to give back to our community. I have a dream that one day our children will know what it is like to feel a hug and a kiss from us and to hear 'I love you' right from our mouths. I have a dream that one day we can teach our children about their siblings in heaven and how much we wanted them that we kept on trying even when it seemed hopeless.

I have a dream that one day I will be able to comfort our daughter's first broken heart. I have a dream that one day my husband will be able to take our sons on fishing trips. I have a dream that one day we will be the proud parents sitting at graduation ceremonies taking pictures of our babies getting their diplomas and degrees. I have a dream that one day our children will find their soul mates and begin their own journey to having a family. I have a dream that their journey will not be as difficult as ours.

I have a dream that one day our angels would be recognized as our children too. I have a dream that one day we will be reunited with our angels in Heaven. I have a dream that one day our angels will feel the warm embrace of our hugs and will finally know just how much they are loved and missed every single day of our lives. 

Last year on Martin Luther King Day it felt as though our dreams were shattered into a million tiny pieces after hearing our third baby no longer had a beating heart. I didn't know if I would ever be able to put the pieces to our dreams back together again after that day. Over the last year I have realized something about myself, something I already knew but had forgotten. I am determined. I am a fighter. I am a dreamer. I will make my dreams come true one way or another.