I have been anxious about my sister's chromosome testing results. I have been anxious about meeting a new OBGYN and fearful she would not agree with ordering any more tests for us. I have been anxious my period being late and the possibility of having ovarian cysts when I've never had ovarian cysts or late periods before our IVF cycle.
Monday's appointment didn't go as plan and I think it was the straw that broke the camel's back. I drove an hour to see my new doctor and when I got to my appointment the receptionist informed me the doctor went home sick and I could reschedule or see the nurse practitioner. I opted to stay to see the nurse practitioner, since I had already made the trip, but when she came into my room and asked why I was there and said "you don't just need an annual exam?", huffed at me, and then told me see read my history and it's too complicated for her so I should reschedule to see the doctor-I was more than just annoyed. Especially when I had to cancel a training that I was scheduled to go to on Wednesday to be able to see the OBGYN before my appointment with the fertility clinic on May 14th because there were no other available dates and times. Then to top off my first impression of this office, I asked if I was going to get billed for my appointment and was informed yes I would because the Nurse Practitioner wrote a note stating she had a consult with me. I informed them telling me she read my history, without discussing my history with me, and then telling me I needed to reschedule was NOT a consult and I will not be paying them for only taking my weight. When I left the office I was hotter than a jalapeno. I felt like nothing has gone right in the past and this just set the tone that nothing is going to go right in the future either.
In some ways it made me all the more angry because I feel like we've been fighting a battle that I don't know if we are supposed to be fighting, and I just wish there was a way to know what our future is supposed to look like, and because there isn't a way-we may continue to add to our hurt with every option that we try that isn't in the plans for us.
My appointment with Dr. Sharma made me feel like I was becoming unstuck. It made me feel like we had a better plan for our future. Then today me and my sister got the call that she DOES NOT have a translocated chromosome....meaning we can move forward with a donor egg IVF cycle! While I am still very sad that we won't be using my own eggs...I am happy to know that there is still an option that will allow me to carry and give birth to our child. Now we just wait for Dr. Braverman to respond to my email and send the information about the needed bloodwork to Dr. Sharma before I can move forward with getting the immunological testing. We still plan to meet with Dr. Awadalla at Institute for Reproductive Health on May 14th and Dr. Hoffman at Bethesda Fertility on May 28th to compare both doctors and clinics so we can decide which clinic we are going to go with.